Monday, November 12, 2007

Anatomy of a Perfect Diwali Holiday

Day 1: Thursday, November 8, 2007; Time: Morning
Wake up with a fever.

Day 1, Time: Mid-Morning
Realize you have a stomach upset too.

Day 1, Time: Noon
Correction. Make that a very bad stomach upset.

Day 1, Time: Afternoon
Lunch: Lemonade + Electral, Medicines.
Other Activities: Look daggers at insensitive family members polishing off special Diwali lunch.

Day 1, Time: Evening
Snack: Lemonade + Electral, Medicines.
Other Activities: Look daggers at insensitive family members polishing off Diwali faral (namkeen and sweets).

Day 1, Time: Night
Dinner: Lemonade + Electral, Medicines.
Other Activities: Look daggers at insensitive family members who claim to be "too full but will have a little more of that chiwda, chakli, etc."

Day 2: Friday, November 9, 2007; Time: Morning
Wake up. Check status.
Status Report: Fever persists.

Day 2, Time: Mid-Morning
Status Report: Stomach upset persists.
Breakfast: Lemonade + Electral, Medicines, half an apple.
Other Activities: Look daggers at insensitive family members polishing off some more Diwali faral.

Day 2, Time: Mid-Morning
The computer conks off. No technicians available due to Diwali.
Related Activity: Curse and sulk.

Day 2, Time: Afternoon
Lunch: Lemonade + Electral, Medicines.
Note to Self: Take your sustenance before (or in a separate room from) insensitive family members enjoying a "proper holiday meal."

Day 2, Time: Evening
Snack: Lemonade + Electral, Medicines.
Note to Self: "Eating" alone is so much better.
Related Activity: 1. Ignore noisy family using the pretext of Lakshmi puja to polish off some more Diwali faral.
2. Ignore noisy guests dropping in to polish off Diwali faral.

Day 2, Time: Night
Dinner: Lemonade + Electral, Medicines, remaining half of the apple.
Other Activities: Try to watch TV. TV conks off too.
Related Activity: Ignore insufferable jibes of being extremely infectious and a risk to the living and the inanimate. Quarantine self in room and try to sleep.

Day 3: Saturday, November 10, 2007; Time: Morning
Wake up. Check status.
Status Report: Fever down but still persists.

Day 3, Time: Mid-Morning
Status Report: Stomach appears settled but with warning signs all over - "Don't try to be adventurous."
Breakfast: Lemonade + Electral, Medicines, one apple.
Other Activities: 1. Try switching the TV on. Give up.
2. Try switching the PC on. Give up.
3. Ignore noisy family.

Day 3, Time: Noon/Afternoon
Pesky guests arrive to celebrate Bhai duj early.
Lunch: A small bowl of rice and curd, Medicines.
Other Activities: 1. Ignore pesky guests enjoying lunch.
2. Ignore noisy family enjoying lunch.
Related Activity: Sulk.

Day 3, Time: Evening
Pesky guests leave.
Snack: Lemonade + Electral, Medicines.
Other Activities: 1. Watch brother and Sis-in-law pack. Recollect that the two are off to Nagpur later for a week.
2. Try some emotional blackmail on Sis-in-law.
Note to Self: Emotional blackmailing skills need some work and updating.
Related Activity: Sulk.

Day 3, Time: Night
Try some more emotional blackmail as brother and Sis-in-law are leaving.
Note to Self: Emotional blackmailing skills need thorough updating and revision.
Dinner: Check what Sis-in-law has left for dinner. Find some more rice and curd. And medicines.
Other Activities: 1. Try switching the TV on. Give up.
2. Try switching the PC on. Give up.
3. Quality reading time.

Day 4: Sunday, November 10, 2007; Time: Morning
Wake up. Check status.
Status Report: Fever gone. Stomach still has a "Fragile! Handle with Care!" warning.
Breakfast: One apple, Medicines.

Day 4, Time: Noon
Lunch: A bowl of rice and curd, Medicines.
Other Activities: 1. Read
2. Try to ignore thoughts about office.

Day 4, Time: Evening
Snack: Lemonade, Medicines
Other Activities: 1. Venture out for a walk with friends.
2. Try to ignore thoughts about office.

Day 4, Time: Night
Dinner: Some more rice and curd, Medicines.
Other Activities: 1. Read
2. Try (unsuccessfully) to ignore thoughts about office.
Related Activity: Succumb to feelings of immense loserliness.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Poor you! :(
Btw, after all this, have you lost some weight? ;)